Blindsided by Retirement

by Anne-Marie
(California)

I was so ready to leave work; I just really hated it, plus it was really stressful.


But now that 2 months has gone by, I really feel like I'm going nuts sometimes, also, I get very lonely and sad and wonder if I'll ever get over feeling bad.

I'm supposed to be having a great time. Work friends are all still caught up in the hub-bub of their jobs.

You have to plan so far in advance due to really busy schedules. I wonder if I still have any friends at all.

I want to volunteer at the SFSPCA and help socialize the kitties that need good homes. When I went to the Orientation, I got so sad and depressed thinking about all these kitties that need homes.

When does it stop? It's really hard and I hope I can get through it.

I'm single, so there's no spouse or kids either; maybe I should have married and settled down and had kids. Too late now, so I just hope I can get through all this change.

It is very upsetting and disorienting. I pray every day, I've tried a few new things, but they make me feel alienated. What else can I say?

Wendy: Anne-Marie, I hear you, and it's not just you as I hear this same story over and over... the good thing is, for most retirees, life does get better!

At first, you lose your work identity, don't really know where you belong, or what you might do for many hours each day. At some point, I pray, you will find yourself -- your new self!

You'll get there - open your eyes to opportunities! This site is changing to be just that - the calm voice in the retirement storm, helping retirees to find themselves again!

Comments for Blindsided by Retirement

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Retired Early and Feeling Anxious
by: Anonymous

My wife retired early a number of years ago and has had a great time of it.

With a lot of stress at work, lack of motivation and declining skills on my part, and my retirement portfolio looking Ok I took the plunge early as well after 29 years as an engineer. After 2 months I'm regretting my decision and feeling a lot of unexpected anxiety.

I'm trying to get out and do things but find myself now wondering if I made a big mistake.

Me too
by: MPCC

Hi,
I know what you mean. I retired 1 month ago for similar reasons and now I am "alone". Family is busy or they just assume I am!! I do not have husband or children ( for Sunday lunch?) so the days all blend in.

I'm not ready to join senior's clubs! Crafting, knitting etc is not for me, so home I stay. I feel myself getting more and more depressed and at only one month in....!

I feel like I just played the biggest joke on myself, but I would NOT go back to the job I left! So, here's hoping it gets better!

Wendy: You need to get OUT of the house, where ever you can go for a few hours. Library? Take a computer classes (adult ed at local schools)? Volunteer in the same field you were in or a completely different field -- it IS different when you volunteer compared to working.

Nobody but you can get yourself out that door -- and nobody can choose something to get involved in. That's up to you, but Please Please DO something!


RE Anne Marie
by: Anonymous

Anne Marie,

What a wonderful start, volunteering at the S.F.SPCA, socializing kitties to bring them that
much being adopted.

You soon will find so much can do, talking to people who want to adopt, talking to at a senior center, talking to kid at school about pet care etc.

Does the SPCA have a Thrift Store, or some other fundraiser? They can use you help. Do they catch feral cats, spay or neuter them, and bring them back to their neighborhood? Every cat you place in a home is an achievement.

Join a senior center. Get involved with crafts, take day trips, go to dances and parties.

Call RSVP. Ask about volunteer opportunities.
Ask Wendy about pen palling. You will never be alone.

Elinor - Been there, done that and now write about it.



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