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I FEEL OLD, YOUNG....

by Linda C.
(Annapolis, MD, USA)

I feel OLD every day when I get out of bed and my feet immediately hurt from my plantar fasciitis and the consequential fibrous 'nodules' on the soles.


I feel OLD as my vertebrae shift, trying to realign - vertical once again after an approximate seven-hours in bed.

I feel OLD when just showering, dressing, and drying my hair leaves me out of breath and then when my knees fight bending as I start down the stairs to let my dog out.

I feel OLD when my legs don't seem to move as fast as I tell them to...across parking lots or to keep up with my husband or friends on 'outings'. I used to be such a fast walker, grinning as I left my companions in the dust!

I walked everywhere for most of my life: to and from my jobs; grocery shopping, for miles to the local library, etc., as I didn't attempt a driver's license until age 39!

Before I retired, one of my listed plans was to take up 'hiking' as I love the outdoors and woods and wildlife...Oh well.

I feel OLD when someone calls me "Ma'm"! Or a young person opens a door for me or lets me move up in a line - their expression/smile, almost 'too kind' as if "Awwww... I'm gonna be nice to this old lady."

Don't get me wrong - I appreciate the kindness, but.

I feel OLD when I catch myself criticizing the 'younger generation' too often!

I feel OLD (and a bit guilty) most nights as I eagerly build my mountain of pillows and settle into them, a blissful moan escaping me as I turn my Kindle on to a current read. Seems so long ago that 'going to bed' meant setting the scene for lovemaking! I DO love my husband but.

I feel OLD when I look down at my hands -- slim tapered fingers, smooth clear skin no more! They are my mother's hands...No. They are my Nana's hands of long ago - freckled and patchy - digits turned sausage. "You have piano fingers!" I used to hear and would love to hear again. (I should have learned piano!)

HOWEVER:

I feel YOUNG when I'm laughing with my gal friends - sharing funny anecdotes and harmless gossip!

I feel YOUNG when the first sips of wine rush mellow through my bloodstream and I see the world before me through rose-colored glasses!

I feel YOUNG being competitive over a game of SCRABBLE with my husband - the two of us letting loose with playful taunts and boasts!

I feel YOUNG when sitting outside on a Spring or Summer day watching my feathered friends so close to me at the feeders or in the flower beds, so trusting of me and my dog -- I chirp and whistle to them and imagine myself as 'Snow White' whose shoulder a bluebird is about to light on!

I feel YOUNG when I play my favorite music and sing along and remember times past that radiated with energy and wild abandon! I am then that girl in those scenes and I remind myself that 'she' still lives within me.

I feel YOUNG when I allow myself in privacy, to be SILLY! Playing with the dog; dancing or walking in an exaggerated fashion from room to room as I dust or lift clutter; talking to myself as I've done since I was a little kid!

I feel YOUNG when I'm with someone older and weaker than I am or if I'm with someone of any age who has not ever experienced adventures/ misadventures in their lives...

Comments for I FEEL OLD, YOUNG....

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I feel old, young
by: Ade

Thank you for that lovely read. I think we can all identify with you. I wish you more 'young' days though

PLEASED
by: Linda C.

I'm pleased that my OLD, YOUNG was acknowledged, enjoyed...perhaps hitting close to home for some. I love expressing my feelings and reading others' as well :)

Nice to have found this site and I hope to find all that it has to offer!

True Poetry
by: Carole K, Olympia, WA

Linda, thank you for that wonderful poem...I know its not a poem, but to me it reflects beautiful sentiments and wise insights.

You are amazing with your words, and I can identify so much with you.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts...Carole K

I feel old, young
by: Carolyn

Wow - you are a writer - I just loved your post. Thank you so much for writing it and sharing.

Re: I feel old, young..
by: Paula

Great post. Thanks for writing it. It has given me some great food for thought!

LOVE THIS!
by: Wendy

Thank you Linda for shaing your thoughts!

LOVE IT!!

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