Making the Change to Retirement, Sucks...

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Making the Change to Retirement, Sucks...

by Tom G
(Valparaiso, In)

I am still in pre-retirement stage. Became severely depressed 3 years ago. Seem to have many regrets in my past family and business aspects.

Too many thoughts. Too many people telling me what I should do with my life.

Work has been my life. Now I have no place in life that seems important.

Yes, I KNOW I should keep busy, control my thoughts, maybe work part time, etc. All good worthy advice.

But... the depression is over bearing.

Have not retired yet, but it is coming soon, Company will probably phase me out. Another negative.

Making the change sucks.

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Making the Change to Retirement, Sucks...

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Be Content
by: Catherine

Tom,

I think you need to make some plans. When I retired, I planned a 3 month trip to India. I took my daughter with me (she was 11). That was a great way to do it. My husband came for 3 weeks and then he went back to work.

Now of course, I am home. I also get a little lonely at times. But I got a dog! I love him. He is a chihuahua, and my best companion. I walk him daily.

I also joined a gym. I also do yoga and meditation. I hope to do a yoga retreat this year.

I paint, and sell some paintings. You need to plan. Maybe take a course at a university. Travel somewhere new, and exercise your brain.

Be happy to be alive. all the best, Catherine.

WHAT DO YOU REALLY LIKE TO DO?
by: Marge Sallee

Tom, I'm sorry to read you are still miserable about facing retirement. There are so many possibilities ahead of you, and there is life after WORK.

Do you like to be outdoors? Find a good fishing buddy with a boat and spend time at the lake. A lot of men I know volunteer to work at the various hospitals around the city doing various jobs. Is your work related to anything that could use good experience, trusted volunteers, etc.

I was a teacher so I know that elementary schools welcome volunteer grandparents to tutor kids, read to them, or just befriend that child who needs a caring adult in his/her life.

Recently visited a local animal shelter in my area and was surprised to see all the volunteers who did things there -- everything from mowing the lot to cleaning the cages to walking the dogs. What surprised me was the camaraderie among them. The jokes and teasing were a great diversion while we were waiting in the office. I almost volunteered to work there myself.

If you are interested in learning new things and having meals with others, look at the Senior Centers in your town. You won't believe all the possibilities you might find. People go there to enjoy conversations, play cards and board games. Get involved in church work if you are inclined in that area. A good friend of mine works in a food pantry/warehouse in his spare time.

When all else you can try to get a job as a greeter at Walmart, sack groceries, or hang out at places you enjoy going to now.

And maybe you should talk to someone about that depression you are feeling.

Marge

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Submitted by: Marge Sallee

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Tom, I'm sorry to read you are still miserable about facing retirement. There are so many possibilities ahead of you, and there is life after WORK. Do you like to be outdoors? Find a good fishing buddy with a boat and spend time at the lake. A lot of men I know volunteer to work at the various hospitals around the city doing various jobs. Is your work related to anything that could use good experience, trusted volunteers, etc. I was a teacher so I know that elementary schools welcome volunteer grandparents to tutor kids, read to them, or just befriend that child who needs a caring adult in his/her life. Recently visited a local animal shelter in my area and was surprised to see all the volunteers who did things there -- everything from mowing the lot to cleaning the cages to walking the dogs. What surprised me was the camaraderie among them. The jokes and teasing were a great diversion while we were waiting in the office. I almost volunteered to work there myself. If you are interested in learning new things and having meals with others, look at the Senior Centers in your town. You won't believe all the possibilities you might find. People go there to enjoy conversations, play cards and board games. Get involved in church work if you are inclined in that area. A good friend of mine works in a food pantry/warehouse in his spare time. When all else you can try to get a job as a greeter at Walmart, sack groceries, or hang out at places you enjoy going to now. And maybe you should talk to someone about that depression you are feeling. Marge

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Retirement sucks.
by: tom g.

Still think that is true... Still awaiting the axe to fall. I just like to be with people and work.

Dump the RV
by: Tom G

Heard alot about RV living. Went with others in
theirs. Check the real expenses then you will stay in hotels and drive. Dump the RV, sell the house and live a little more relaxed.

Hotel, motel car travel is cheaper, if you are honest with expenses.

Disability Retirement - When Retirement is Thrust Upon You
by: Marge Sallee

Retirement is a lot like getting older -- they go hand in hand. I had a teaching career that I once felt I'd work at even if they didn't pay me. Helping students learn new things and get more sophisticated in thinking was about the most exciting thing I could imagine. It was more than a profession; in my case, it was a calling.

But my body wore out, and before I had reached those magic numbers for retirement which I wasn't particularly looking forward to, the doctor recommended that I should take disability. In my case it was a gradual procedure. I had so much accumulated sick leave that it kept me going at full pay for a semester; then I was in the sick leave bank and that kept the income coming almost for the rest of the year. I couldn't work, but I didn't lose my pay check.

But when that was over, and I did go on disability, I still felt like I was on some kind of extended vacation and would return sooner or later.

What is the answer? Get an avocation that feels like you are doing an important job and work at home. What do you enjoy most about your job? What part of it can you do at home? Can you volunteer using those same skills to help others? Some join AARP; accountants volunteer to help old people do their income taxes. Teachers can become story tellers at the local library and anyone can be a "volunteer grandparent" in a local elementary school. If you are able to get out, apply to be a school crossing guard, a busboy at the supermarket, a greeter at Walmart,a helper at your church.or Deliver Meals on Wheels. The list is long for senior volunteers who are responsible. Get your mind off of yourself and make yourself get involved with other people. If that fails, find a part-time job.

The surprising thing is that the more you think about other people, the less you think about your plight. Your time will be filled with other people who need you and your attention.

Good luck on your quest. Retirement can be one of the best adventures of your life. As the Good Master said, "Seek and ye shall find."

Now excuse me. I have to get busy on my daily goal of writing 1700 words per day on my November novel.

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Submitted by: Marge Sallee

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Retirement is a lot like getting older -- they go hand in hand. I had a teaching career that I once felt I'd work at even if they didn't pay me. Helping students learn new things and get more sophisticated in thinking was about the most exciting thing I could imagine. It was more than a profession; in my case, it was a calling. But my body wore out, and before I had reached those magic numbers for retirement which I wasn't particularly looking forward to, the doctor recommended that I should take disability. In my case it was a gradual procedure. I had so much accumulated sick leave that it kept me going at full pay for a semester; then I was in the sick leave bank and that kept the income coming almost for the rest of the year. I couldn't work, but I didn't lose my pay check. But when that was over, and I did go on disability, I still felt like I was on some kind of extended vacation and would return sooner or later. What is the answer? Get an avocation that feels like you are doing an important job and work at home. What do you enjoy most about your job? What part of it can you do at home? Can you volunteer using those same skills to help others? Some join AARP; accountants volunteer to help old people do their income taxes. Teachers can become story tellers at the local library and anyone can be a "volunteer grandparent" in a local elementary school. If you are able to get out, apply to be a school crossing guard, a busboy at the supermarket, a greeter at Walmart,a helper at your church.or Deliver Meals on Wheels. The list is long for senior volunteers who are responsible. Get your mind off of yourself and make yourself get involved with other people. If that fails, find a part-time job. The surprising thing is that the more you think about other people, the less you think about your plight. Your time will be filled with other people who need you and your attention. Good luck on your quest. Retirement can be one of the best adventures of your life. As the Good Master said, "Seek and ye shall find." Now excuse me. I have to get busy on my daily goal of writing 1700 words per day on my November novel.

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Planning for Retirement, by Elinor Nuxoll
by: Anonymous

Tom,

I can understand why you are depressed.

You feel you could lose your job at a moment's
notice. It is easier if you are the one who decides to retire. When I told the boss I wanted to retire by March 31 that year, he asked me to stay until June 30 and help with the transition,including evaluating applicants to help choose my replacement.

I suggest you talk to the boss about your job, share opinions on when you should retire and offer to help in selecting and training someone to take your place. If your job will just be phased out and no new hire to replace you, someone will need to be trained to do your work.

If you help decide the date you should retire, you can feel more in charge and you can also be thinking of what you want to do next: Start a new career, work part-time, volunteer? Start planning and get excited about the changes you will be making.

Elinor Nuxoll, in my 80s and still writing for publication and enjoying my family.

Depression in Retirement
by: Wendy

Tom,

You sound like you know what you SHOULD do, but just can't quite get there.

I hope you are talking to your doctor about your depression -- don't let it simply get worse and worse, until life comes crashing down around you.
Please see your doctor, they can help you...

There's lots more life to live, and it's your choice on how to "do retirement".... DO IT WELL as you have your work life!

You simply must get past this retirement depression issue -- I *know* what you are feeling, the anxiety, as I too have the same for 3.5 years now. The "decision" of retirement does not come easily to us workaholics.. but there IS a light at the end of the work tunnel!

Wendy

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Making the Change to Retirement, Sucks...

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