Stroke, then Retirement
A year ago I had a stroke and those changes are challenging but that threw me into retiring from a job before intended.
I was 57 at that time and now am 58. I have made strides in my recovery. I was sure that with the disabilities from the stroke I wouldn't be able to handle the pressures and stress of the job. So, I was scared about trying to go back. I regret now that I didn't try.
I gave up a pretty good income and benefits and lots of responsibilities...and I admit stresses that many thought contributed to the stroke.
I now stay at home and can't quit thinking about what I gave up and notice that many look at me now with less respect than before even some family....more so I tend to not respect myself either.
I know I have to move beyond that and find purpose to fill my days. I find my self filling some of the void with my faith in the Lord.
I worked at the job 35 years 9 months and was planning on going at least 40 if not more. I thought that when I left I would have all the time to do what I wanted and not have to adhere to a forced schedule. I was so looking forward to that...but then the reality set in and I began to miss being needed by others.
Not to say that my family doesn't need me, thats not the case, but I don't feel I contribute anymore like I was. Its a terrible rut to fall into. I also need to make myself busy and just have found that yet...so I know what your feeling and your are NOT alone!
I hope things improve for you. Take care.
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