I am Forgotten

by Rita

This is a good place to write one's true feelings as I for sure am forgotten in this old world.

I am completely alone far as family and relatives go, and as far as friends go. I have some who claim to be Christians but their friendship is a one way street. I call and talk with them, but they never bother to call me, not even at holiday time to say Merry Christmas/Happy new year. They never invite a lonely sole over for cookies and coffee at christmas, but they invite others.

Presents, what are they? I don't get such things anymore and haven't in years, this is the honest truth, no one cares anymore about me. I love the Lord and my little dog, and I care about people.

My Mom always cared about those who was alone and invited them in for a holiday meal, she has been gone for 46 years, I have been all alone since then, the holidays are very hard for me, and it hurts.

Comments for I am Forgotten

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Ask God to help you to take the lead in initiating friendship
by: Pamela Hahn

Hi Rita. If you have God, you are not alone.

I think Joe W had some good advice in terms of reaching out. And I think you have done that with your article. It sounds like you need to grow some new friends.

The best way to find new friends is to find where you can take classes or participate in activities you like. Perhaps crafts, or art classes or perhaps Community College classes in whatever interests you. Volunteering is a great idea because your spirits will be lifted by helping another and most will show their apprciation AND you will meet other volunteers.

Growing friends takes some effort. You may have to take the first steps or demonstrate a positive attitude that others will be attracted to. We cultivate friends by showing love. . .forgiving when they have disappointed us. . .and demonstrating how we want to be treated by treating them that way. That is what your Mother was doing when she invited those who were alone to share with her family.

Perhaps you can offer to share time with someone else whom you think may be alone. Pray for guidance and for the courage to take the lead.

May I ask what part of the country you are in? Are you on Facebook or some other site where you will get 'news' feeds from someone you friend? That helps one to feel connected.
Don't Listen To Those Negative Thoughts
by: Retired Traveller

Rita: Maybe now, being a new year, is the time to do some volunteer work or do some soul-searching as to what interests you in the way of hobbies, social activities. Your church is a good place to start. By giving back, not only will you meet new friends, but you will not feel so lonely. Lonliness brings depression, and they do a good dance together.

Be pro-active and tell yourself that you do deserve to be happy.

Wishing you the very best as you - move forward!

Been there
Forgotten
by: Joe W.

Rita,

I don't know you personally but I think that you probably need to reach out more to others. I know that it is lonely if you wait for others to contact you. If I didn't have the 'Seniorpreneur Project' which takes up a lot of my time to keep it going, I wouldn't know what I would be doing instead of my Project.

Do you have any interests and/or goals that if you just tried them out would produce a more interesting life? Do you have any Dreams left that could lead you closer to solving some of your personal problems.

Good Luck!

Joe W.
Alone
by: Anonymous

I think this happens a lot more than most realize. Maybe you could volunteer at a local hospital or retirement home and start meeting a new set of friends.
We are with you, no body is forgetten
by: Ashfaq Gulzar

Rita, You are a great because you have spoken to a very intensive information media. No body has forgetten you and you live in our heart and soul.

Since we are at a very different distance and different caltures perhaps it could not be possible to meet you in life. You are the strong believer of Christanity, you love God and his human beings. Please do not get dishearted and keep loving every thing of the world. Please keep your self busy and keep loving humanity.

I am Ashfaq Gulzar, 64 years, male retired Engineer, father and grand father. I love you be 2013 be a happiest year for you. Always smile some time on us the people which poses to be very busy and some time at your self, perhaps you may be over demanding.
So Sad For YOU!
by: sharyn

Dearest Rita,
l am 65 & l have been where u r now. You r the only 1 who can help yourself. Likely u need some counselling with a professional to talk about why u choose to be all alone! Sounds like this is a habit for u, spending time alone. Likely u have gotten yourself into a rut with nowhere to turn. Forget about the people from your past, this is your life, and so u must get on with it! There r PLACES out there for u to seek out, new people to meet, seniors' center, the community u live in, l am sure has a multitude of services u can access. The library is another good place to start* Come on Rita, u CAN do this! There is a future out there for u, u must get it all together & go for it & good luck.
I CARE FORGOTTEN ONE!
by: Roslyn

Hi Rita: I read your post this morning and it made me feel so very sad that you feel "forgotten" in this life.

I can relate to you in my own way. I have had some very long time friends that surely do not make me a priority in their lives anymore. However, I have made a conscious decision to detach myself from some of them, as I want friends to be as loving, caring, and giving as I feel I am. I feel people can be very selfish and only think of themselves.

I am not in the best of health and have chronic pain and I just feel so misunderstood and hurt by some people I have called my "good" friends. I understand how you feel! However, I am so very fortunate that I have two dear loving and caring daughters who love me and do care about me.

I also live alone with my cat who loves me when I am up and when I am down. Unconditional love!

Rita, where do you live? If you happen to live in my state, I would be happy to come visit.

Your post has inspired me to want to do volunteer work with seniors that feel the same way you and I do and just want to feel that someone cares and will love us during the good and bad times. Don't feel like you are all alone because there are many other people out there that feel the same way. Perhaps you might want to start the new year by helping those who feel the same way you do, making new friends, and having a happier life.

I truly hope you find your way.........I care!
NOT FORGOTTEN
by: Anonymous

RITA, YOU ARE NOT FORGOTTEN.GOD LOVES YOU MORE THAN YOU KNOW. I LOST MY MOM 32 YEARS AGO. I SPENT ALL HOLIDAYS AT HER HOUSE. BUT I HAD TO LEARN TO GIVE OF MYSELF AND I FOUND THERE WERE MANY IN THE SAME BOAT.

SO I GOT INTO A CHURCH GROUP BY MYSELF. MADE WONDERFUL FRIENDS. PEOPLE TODAY ARE SO BUSY WITH THEIR OWN LIVES THEY DON'T THINK OF LONELY PEOPLE ETC.

IF YOU LIVED CLOSE TO ME I WOULD INVITE YOU TO MY HOUSE. AND GIVE YOU PRESENTS TOO. I AM BY MYSELF BUT I KNOW GOD LOVES ME.

IF YOU WILL CONTACT ME I WILL WRITE YOU PERSONALLY.I LIVE IN CALIFORNIA. I AM VISION IMPAIRED IS WHY THIS IS IN BIG LETTERS.

I CARE ABOUT YOU RITA.I AM A SENIOR. HANG IN THERE RITA.
Someone needs you dearest friend
by: Joy- sometimes Joyful

Hello dear friend,

You sound like I felt when I was first retired. I am NOT alone, in that I have a loving husband 2 loving mutts and a wonderful daughter, though she is 9 hours away in NYC. But I know how you feel, as do others on this website.

I do not know your age, but if you just retired, you might find out your "friends" were only colleagues... maybe you are in a place like me, where if you are not family or church, you are not a part.

I might suggest that you go online and search the site for Volunteering in your area. There will be so many places who will need you I promise and through the folks you meet volunteering, you will be amazed at the feeling of love and appreciation you will get.

Having had 2 bouts of cancer, I volunteer at my local cancer center.

I think you might be feeling useless. That is common in retirement I am finding out also. But you are not. You just need something to do. If you have a local library they also need volunteers as a local hospital might.

I talked to my pastor and he found me a bit of work within the church to make me feel more useful.

I retired from a career where I was around people, high school kids, all the time. I am very social and used to talking all the time. It has been a great adjustment being alone all day, as my husband still is teaching for one more year and as I said we have no family here and few friends. Everyone is related but us. LOL But WE know why God put us here. Just know that God will get you through this tough time.

Call people you think are friends, and invite them over. They may think you want to be alone. Reaching out for friends and to GIVE to others will help you much I promise.

Wendy, founder of this site, might recognize me from months ago when I was where you were. Things are slowly turning around. Much of it is acceptance. That is hard I know. I wish you the best dear friend. Please let me, Joyful and the rest of us know how you are coming along. You can always find someone to chat with on here also. We probably have all been where you are.

God bless you. Don't give up. It will get better. Thank you for your honesty.

Hugs, More Joyful than before, Joy K Collins

Wendy: Thrilled to hear that retirement is getting better 'n better for you, Joy! Just takes time to figure out who you are and what you want to do with your time!! Best Wishes!!
You are not forgotten
by: Eileen Sardano

You are not forgotten. God knows each of us by name and is always available to us.
There are other people out there that feel forgotten. I was one of them.....
Just be brave and reach out. You will be pleasantly surprised to find a hand reaching back.

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