Alone Again...Naturally

by John A
(Tyler, TX)

In 1972 Gilbert O’Sullivan sang a song about being alone and was one of Rock N Roll’s top hits for that year.

Before delving into what I want to say, take a little time to read the lyrics to that song.

The lyrics are little depressing, but help make my point about being alone.

“Alone Again…Naturally”

In a little while from now
If I'm not feeling any less sour
I promised myself to treat myself
And visit a nearby tower

And climbing to the top
Will throw myself off
In an effort to make it clear to who
Ever what it's like when you're shattered

Left standing in the lurch, at a church
Where people are saying
My God that's tough, she stood him up
No point in us remaining

May as well go home
As I did on my own
Alone again, naturally

To think that only yesterday
I was cheerful, bright and gay
Looking forward to, but who wouldn't do
The role I was about to play

But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch
Cut me into little pieces

Leaving me to doubt
All about God and His mercy
For if He really does exist
Why did He desert me

In my hour of need?
I truly am indeed
Alone again, naturally

It seems to me that
There are more hearts
Broken in the world
That can't be mended

Left unattended
What do we do? What do we do?

Alone again naturally

Now looking back over the years
And what ever else that appears
I remember I cried when my father died
Never wishing to hide the tears

And at sixty five years old
My mother, God rest her soul
Couldn't understand, why the only man
She had ever loved had been taken

Leaving her to start with a heart
So badly broken
Despite encouragement from me
No words were ever spoken

And when she passed away
I cried and cried all day
Alone again, naturally
Alone again, naturally

Songwriters
GRUSIN, DAVID
Published by
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, EMI Music Publishing, Warner/Chappell Music, Inc., Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Now that you all have read those lyrics I thought I would share some thoughts about loneliness in retirement.

For many of us, including me, we wrapped ourselves up into our work. Many of our friends were coworkers or other business associates. When we retired, all of that interaction with others came to a sudden stop. We no longer had the hustle and bustle of the work place and now some feel isolated and alone. It is soon realized we didn't plan enough to take on new activities and make new friends.

Recently, it came out in the news media where studies were published about people being alone. Obviously the studies indicated being alone is not good for us. It leads to depression, suicide and health problems. This is particularly true where an individual is faced with being alone in retirement and not coming home to a spouse because he/she passed on, or went on elsewhere because of divorce.

It’s important for all of us in our retirement years to find ways to socialize with others and make activities to occupy our time. In doing so, it will help deal with that feeling of being alone which can be a miserable experience if nothing is done about it.

It’s a pretty sad experience for one to go home not having activities and people to be around and sit staring at the idiot box…the TV. The TV makes noise and breaks the silence of an existence with nothing to look forward too in life. And when the TV is off, the silence can be deafening. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt and hat.

So for those of you out there who are faced with this type of dilemma of being alone and newly retired, get out there and find something to occupy your time; anything.

Take some dance lessons, get involved in church, volunteer, take a class...do anything except for hitting the bars. Bars are full of lonely people and you don't want to share their problems. Therefore, it’s important to go out and make new friends to share thoughts and experiences; to start a new life by cultivating the self by learning new things.

Otherwise, you’ll only be Alone Again…Naturally.

Comments for Alone Again...Naturally

Click here to add your own comments

More...
by: John A

In a previous post, I mentioned things about loneliness in retirement and what can be done to remedy that situation.

Here is a link showing some retired men who found a unique way to occupy their time. Have a good laugh!

http://www.youtube.com/embed/96I_UrTOZF0

read your reply
by: Sharyn~~~CANADA

To John A ~ From Sharyn Canada

THANK YOU **

Re: NO TRUER WORDS ARE WRITTEN~~
by: JohnA

To Sharyn~~~CANADA:

Volunteering isn't for everyone. So you may need to find some other activity to give meaning and purpose to your life. I happen to find it rewarding by putting a smile on someone's face by telling a corny joke or story when they are feeling bad because of illness or injury.

Since you indicated you didn't get much satisfaction from volunteering, I suggest doing something else....anything but sit in front of the idiot box...the television. I think TV is the biggest social/health problem we have today since so many plant themselves in front of the screen for hours on end and become sedentary. It's bad for your physical health and it's bad for your mental well being, as well. There's not much on TV these days that has any redeeming benefits to the human psyche. It's full of sex, drug use, and violence. The news casts have a political slant to them that makes one sick and tired of hearing. The comedy is filthy and mean spirited. And TV seems to glorify those in Hollywood that have very questionable values and are lousy roll models for anyone to follow.

So, don't become part of the dead head crowd and sit in front of the TV. You say you have 15-20 good years left in you. So get out there an make hay while the sun shines by doing something constructive. Ask yourself what your interests are in life. What do you like to do? Why can't you turn one of those interests into a small business? Why can't you teach others about a hobby you like to do? The questions are endless and so are YOUR possibilities to find satisfaction in your retirement years; too many years to sit in front of the idiot box.

I think this web site is an excellent place to start. Look at what Wendy did in her retirement. She turn her attention to helping retirees like you and me by providing great information and a forum to express our thoughts and ideas.

I suggest sitting down at a table with paper and pencil and start writing down some ideas of what you would like to do. Pick one or two of those ideas and develop a plan of action; then let the creative juices flow by brain storming in expanding your ideas. The possibilities are endless. And you may very well find a totally new career, hobby or other interest to cultivate the self; to become a better person, to expand your horizons. Go for it lady!!!! Time's is a wastin'

NO TRUER WORDS ARE WRITTEN~~
by: Sharyn~~~CANADA

To John A

WOW, wonderful, magnificent, powerful words! Yes, l agree with the words in the song referred to.

U r absolutely right about losing connections to people once worked with & neighbors once lived beside & friends one grew up with!

As we age we all wonder, who, what, how, where r they all to this day! We wonder if they(having been a friend at 1 x) would recognize us if seen on the street~park~bus~ or wherever?

Except for my computer & needle-work, l too, sit in front of that big black box pretending that it is my family or best friend?

When perhaps l may have another 15 or 20 years to live??

l wonder how will l get thru them~ l read the part about volunteering - tried it but was not rewarding enough for me! However, l must keep looking for something worthwhile & meaningful to ME.

IT is out there, l just have to go looking for IT ~~
Thank u John A.

My Better Half - A Volunteer at Heart
by: Wendy, Retirement-Online.com

John posted this: "Take a look at this!!! The link below will take you to a story in the Tyler newspaper this morning about my better half and her career as a volunteer coordinator.

Be sure to scroll through the three different pictures using the little arrow figures just below the picture.

I guess you could say I'm proud of her!!!!!!!!!"

Longtime Volunteer Lives to Help Others.

Alone but content
by: Nina from London

Hello,

After losing my husband and then my daughter going off to University I sat in my quiet house and it was devastating. I felt more alone than I had ever been in my life. The empty rooms with all of their memories overwhelmed me and the silence was painful. Just to put on the radio so that there would be a sound. It wasn't a happy time for me.

Then my friends would visit but it still didn't fill the emptiness. The soul searching question of "What do I do with my life?" went round and round in my head. Thankfully my friend Eve came over and said, "God will guide your footsteps!"

It has been a slow progression and not an easy one but I can say that I have renewed my life filling it with things that I love to do. This means helping at two charities, painting, teaching, getting involved in church. Most of all I know I am never alone because of my faith. Many things change in your life but the constant love you receive spiritually stays forever.

Sincerely, Nina

letter
by: O.P.Joshi

Dear,
How you can be alone
Whole world of friends is with you
your creativity is with you
you power of poetry wrting is with you
you are great,you provide strength to friends
do not feel lonelyness
Enjoy and remain happy. Om Joshi

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Write Your Own Story Here (so that others can comment on YOUR story too!)!.