Retirement: It's like the loss of a loved one
(Santa Claus, IN)
I've read a lot of this stories about anxiety and depression in retirement. I identified with the loss of identity.
This has definitely been a grieving process of my work career. I had lots of jobs, most of them in the counseling field or teaching. But I always worked full-time. It was hard to let go, but it was what I knew I wanted. It was hard for me to realize that this was what was best for me. I like the comment that "you will never finish the book if you keep reading the same chapter".
I've been retired for 2 years in January. Where am I today? I've found my niche, doing what I want to do, I have hobbies, quilting, reading, piano, and word games on my Kindle.
How do I feel today? Still feel that sense of loss, but it is fading. It didn't suddenly get better. The best thing that has helped me recently has been this website and reading others' stories. This is what I've been looking for all along. And an Al-Anon book, "Opening Our Hearts Transforming Our Losses
". It's about grieving for all kinds of losses.
Each day is a little different in terms of how I feel. I feel a little down today so I logged on to this website and read some stories. I'm going to read my Bible and some other helpful books. What I need to work on are the negative messages, like, "Why don't you just get over it?" and "Why aren't you grateful?"
I AM grateful. I'm grateful I am away from the stress. I'm grateful that I can have lots of fun working on my hobbies. I'm grateful that I have a wonderful husband. But I also need to give myself permission to acknowledge my sense of loss and not beat up on myself.
As Louise Hay said this is the biggest adjustment of my life.Wendy:
Hey folks, first, I added the Amazon link to the book -- there are 40ish for under $1.50 (used), plus shipping, but still CHEAP -- so go grab them if you are having issues with this transition adjustment. This definately is a loss... and a huge one at that.
Nancy, Just wanted to acknowledge your progress... everyone has good days and bad days, but you recognize it as just that! You looked for help, intuitively considered your options -- and life is coming back into focus again! So thrilled for you!