Admitting you need to change things

by Sue/ Carolinas


I have some thoughts from my situation and experience which might be helpful. I divorced and soon after moved to a very different way of life. I moved from a medium sized city to a small home that I could afford near a lake. I live alone there, and after two years trying to build activities and a satisfying life, I decided to sell my house.

I do have a very few good friends there, but I learned more about what activities I really do like that I cannot do there, so I am going to where I can do those things.

Mainly as a single (alone) person, I need to combine my interests--birdwatching, libraries and public speakers, watching college sports live on campuses, learning new crafts with a teacher or workshop, swimming, historical reenactment groups--with a local group or club that brings me together with like-minded people. So I picked a city with those clubs and amenities.

I will not own a house again, I will adjust to apartment living with my cat.

I have no grandkids and my sons live far away, but I am happy in my own life. Be sure wherever you go that you can stay content and healthy without money fears, whatever your family members may do.

Hope this helps,


Comments for Admitting you need to change things

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Active City
by: Terri/Milwaukee

I totally agree with you. My husband and I have a cabin on a lake up north and it’s great to go to when you want to be in nature and chill out after a busy work week. But a completely different scenario when we retire. I think I would be completely bored there.

I would want to move back to Madison, a college town, audit classes and all the events the City has. My must have list includes libraries, good cinemas and many activities to do.

I want to snowbird someplace once a year for a month. I know people who do more than a month and get bored doing that too. They are anxious to get home.

The secret is finding your version of home and keeping balanced. More is not necessarily more.

by: Doris Reinert

Sue - I gave my new move three years to discover that I need the same elements you mention. I heard someone on television this morning say that we need food, water, air, vitamins and connection.

I have to connection here either to people or the things I like to do so am moving on.

Solitude and loneliness are two different things. I just disagree with one thing you said - stay contented. I’ve always been restless and feel that is what motivates me.

Stay well!

Follow you passions
by: Jane

Hi, Sue,
You have very good advise. I am a recent widow with little surviving family who do not live near me. I have a 19 year old son who is going to college and son will be on his own.

Once I can collect on my pension and he has graduated I am going to relocate elsewhere so I can follow my passions in a busier area where I have more opportunity to meet like-minded people. I will relocate my business as well.

you sound like you have figured it out
by: ppllpp Green Bay wi

I like your article and see how you decided what you like and went for it! Good for you.

I like in Wisconsin and find the winters too long but cannot afford to move there. So I work part-time to make winter doable but I have really wanted to go to Florida Jan-March.

I love biking, walking, and just enjoying the sun. You make me think how life is just too short to not enjoy living.

Also we downsized to a condo 6 years ago and very glad NOW that we did. Don't need the overhead of a house or the obligations of a house.

Good luck. Keep us updated.

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