Everyone seems to think I have all the time in the world now

by Jennifer Donovan
(Houghton, MI, USA)

Hey, I'm retired. But I'm still busy, busier than ever, it seems, with my church, my community library and several other organizations.

But people keep asking me to do more and more, "because you've retired, so we know you have time now." No, I don't.

But how do I say no without making people mad and seeming uncaring? I'd welcome any suggestions.

Comments for Everyone seems to think I have all the time in the world now

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Some ideas for a busy lady
by: Sandy

Jennifer - how great that you are enjoying such a full retirement. In response to people asking you to do more, what if you just said something like "I'd love to but I have already committed to so many things that I just can't add one more and still do a good job. I'll take a raincheck for when things lighten up."

I am sure that others will have many other suggestions, too, that will allow you to maintain your boundaries but still be kind to those who are asking for help.

Btw, there is no harm in being assertive and standing up for yourself. You have worked hard your life and now it you should feel no guilt in creating the schedule you want to maintain now.

Best wishes.

your busy
by: Sherry/NC

You take charge of your life and don't allow others to do so!

You say, I am sorry, but I am very busy with my life right now and I can't help you at this time; that is what I would say.

Some folks will ask you what are you busy with?! If you don't want to answer them you say why do you ask or you can say I have this many volunteer jobs. You don't have to explain yourself

NO!
by: Wee-zer

Jennifer, you must learn to say no! Tell these people that you would be happy to help but at this time your calendar is filled up. When things settle down, you will review what more you can add to it.

You are allowed to have a life and you are allowed to do nothing if you choose. Nobody has to have every single day scheduled to the moon. If you want to have 'ME' days, be a couch potato, eat donuts and watch movies all day long, so be it! You earned your time to do what you want without GUILT!

Do not be spineless and let these people guilt you into anything! Keep blaming the calendar being full. Repeat...I would love to help but my calendar is full at this time.

Your calendar doesn't have to be filled with volunteer stuff. You may have doctor appointments, lunch with friends or family, day at the beach, dog training classes, grocery shopping, hair appointment, YMCA classes, senior center activities. Or your calendar can be void of anything but it is your life and your time.

You could ask what the volunteer opportunities are and maybe you can cherry pick some small thing to do if you do wish to do something. Like for instance, if you worked for the animal shelter and they needed someone to wash towels and things at the shelter. Tell them you could donate one hour to do that. A load of wash usually takes under half and hour and a load of drying takes about half an hour.

Put your big girl panties on and learn to say I would be glad to help but my calendar is full at this time...