How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity in Retirement

by John A
(Tyler, TX)

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing 'em Slow Down!

2. On all your cheque stubs, write 'For Marijuana'!

3. Skip down the street Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

4. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

5. Sing Along At The Opera.

6. When The Money Comes Out of The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

7. When Leaving the Zoo, start Running towards the Car Park, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

8. Tell Your Children over dinner: 'Due to the economy,we are going to have to let one of you go...

9.. Pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the counter and ask whee the fitting room is.

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity: my favourite.

10. Go to a large Department store’s fitting room, drop your drawers to your ankles and yell out: “THERE IS NO PAPER IN HERE”!

Comments for How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity in Retirement

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by: Pat

These are hilarious.
If one is ever in a slump, trying one of these suggestions would have to make you feel better.

by: Carol

Those are hilarious! I wonder if anyone would really have the nerve for some? I love the one with a hair dryer and sunglasses!

Funny to be different
by: Nina from London

That last one...about dropping your drawers...don't think I would be brave enough to try that one. Only for someone who doesn't care a hoot what anyone thinks...Ha Ha Ha

Be you
by: jennifer Whitby

Be the way you want to be ,do what you want to do ,go where you want to go ,dress how you want to,stay up late and get up late,dye your hair ,wear your make up everyday ,(we never know who we might bump into) dont be afraid to say no if you really do not want to do something, join a new class doing something that you have always wanted to do, love your family and friends ,enjoy your life to the full for tomorrow may never come.

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