I have belongings older than my psychiatric counselor

by Serbella McGee
(St. Louis, MO)

I posted my story here: https://www.retirement-online.com/i-thought-i-was-losing-my-mind-at-first.html


First, I apologize not not being around. My internet connection is notoriously slow and touchy. And if this is in the wrong place and has to be moved or deleted, I understand that too.

Anyway, for counseling I looked up one of the universities here in the area. They have low-cost clinics staffed by students on a sliding scale.

My counselor is a nice young lady, and I admit I thought at first I would have trouble relating to her. I don't think she gets all of what I'm saying, especially about retirement, but I feel she does understand a lot of it, especially when I tell her I feel lost and sometimes unable to cope with all this free time I have now.

She gives me assignments, like writing out a to do list for the year that makes me think about the kind of life I want for myself.

I don't like winter. I hate cold weather. I'm seriously considering hibernating in the winter until spring.

I have more than enough to keep me occupied at home, and I enjoy knowing that I don't have to go out and deal with idiot co-workers and ungrateful employers.

I have swung to the manic side, I think: not wanting to sleep, a little annoyed that there aren't enough hours in the day to do what I want.

I'm writing again, and I picked up a paintbrush and painted art. I haven't done that in 7 years. It feels better than being sluggish and depressed, but I don't want to crash, either.

My counselor and I have discussed this. I think she's 23; it amuses me that she's younger than some of my belongings. I keep my appointments, and I'm figuring out what I want to do from now on.

I've heard it said that it doesn't get better, you do. I believe that's true.

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Hi, Zenobia!
by: Serbella

Thanks for your comment. I don't think I'm that brave. This is not the first time I've had to seek counseling. I know my triggers. I decided in the beginning that if this counselor didn't work out I was always free to find another one.

I agree with you, I think it's good sometimes to get out of our heads and see things from a younger perspective.

I feel the same way, about not knowing whether to laugh or turn these young'uns over my knee and spank them. They're not all bad and they're not all brats, either.

I laugh when I imagine her case notes or what she says about me after I leave. Nice thing about being "mature": I don't censor myself anymore. I let it all hang out.

I hear you!
by: Zenobia

I can truly relate. I am older than my boss and have belongings older than he is as well. I listen to his concerns and problems and do not know whether to laugh or turn him over my knee, but he is such a good and compassionate man that I find myself learning from him and respecting not only his place in life but his perspective.

He was born in a time and place where civil rights marches, the draft and other things were not in place so he thinks people should just try to "get along" and for the most part, I applaud his time of life. He is blinded sometimes by his suburban upbringing, but he learned fairness and acceptance as an adult.

I thought I might never say this but I am constantly learning from those who are younger..perhaps it is time that we all took a closer look at their ideas, opinions and suggestions.

You are very brave to turn your inner thoughts and feelings over to a 23 year old. Good for you!

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