Is this it?

by Carol
(West Chester PA)

Retired Dec 2011. Went on cruises, babysat grandkids, went to the gym. Have to watch $$$ so no more cruises, grandkids started schools or moved away. Now covid, no gym. No day trips, no nothing. Bored.

House is a mess, I live alone. Body is aching, stiff. Not exercising. Today, I got out of bed at 2:30pm.

Downward spiral. Is this all to life? Groundhog day? Barely want to do anything including talking with friends on zoom or the phone.

Politics bother me. What has happened to my country that democracy is being overpowered for dictatorship antics? I vote, that is what I can and did do, now I have to wait for Nov 3rd or beyond for the results.

What do people in my age range, 77, do to have purpose to their lives? There is only so much tv, so much knitting, crocheting, gardening, etc before it becomes meaningless. Phone calls, for what purpose - we aren't meeting up to go on a day trip. My friends are getting sick, entering hospitals, they aren't available for day trips.

I have an Etsy shop, never very successful but something to do. Sell soft stress relief balls, isn't that ironic!

When I worked it was engaging work with professors and graduate students. Before that Head of a Children's dept in a public library. Loved the children, the parents, caretakers. Love planning and holding children's programs. Pay and benefits were better at the university which is why I changed libraries. But back to today. It is blank, dreary, and every day I awake to the same messy house from the day before.

I don't have a dog because I walk so slow that it would soil it's self before I could get it outside. I can't safely bend over to clean up the mess. Only have a large goldfish which has lasted for 8 years! so, a messy house, overwhelming regrets over the path not explored when young, inertia, staring at nothing.

Comments for Is this it?

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Well heck!
by: Anonymous

Depression comes in all forms. Seems like you have nothing to do that is uplifting to you personally.

People can tell you and suggest to you a multitude of things to do to up lift but what works for one does not work for another.

I retired 6 years ago and have had my ups and downs. Now each day I try to find something engaging to do even if it is trying a new and complicated recipe then sharing my good or bad creation with someone.

Formerly had a dog but too much maintenance. Now I have this lovely kitty that followed me home and she is an inside/outside cat and takes care of her own needs. I just feed and pet her. Good company.

My daughter bought me a Kindle and I read read read and love it. I dig in the dirt planting whatever takes my fancy. Love growing herbs since they are easy, you can use in recipes and grow inside and out.

Covid put a damper on my church attendance and visiting family and friends but this too will rectify itself.

Go get a new and different hair cut/style, update your makeup and just see how much better you will feel.

And for goodness sake, get out of bed, get dressed and see all that your surroundings have to offer.

Betcha there is a senior bus that will pick you up and take you to their center(wear a mask) to have lunch or play cards or just visit.

Good luck and remember we only go around once unless you believe in reincarnation. On that subject, i am not so sure!

This isnt it
by: Lynn Luck Western Australia

Just a looking at these posts shows you, you are not alone.

Your project Is to find a way forward and to keep a journal so you can pass on what you learned .

Your messy house is overwhelming you. can you work on One area at a time?

I find great company in the UK BBC Radio iplayer an app on my phone accessble on computer too . Lots of stations the best of which is Radio 4 extra. I love listening while doing chores .
Get near plants . Pot plants or a park .
Meditate . Just 10 mins a day makes all the difference . Smiling Mind an excellent app . Lots on the internet too.

Do anything that puts you In touch with people . Dont expect too much of them or yourself .

If not a dog maybe a cat. Can be a comfort .

All the best in this new phase of life . It is not easy but it is possible .

Is This It Reply
by: Carol, Canada

I took up a little hobby on my phone. It's paint by number. I do it for hours and hours, you get addicted. Really filled a void for me.

Every time I feel anxiety, stress or boredom I colour a few pictures (or a lot). It provides hours of endless fun. My sister got addicted as well and also my daughter, granddaughter and a few friends. I've been better since I've been doing that. Every day they send new pictures, have contests, it's endless fun. I have been doing it for almost a year and haven't gotten tired of it yet.

I have a dog who used to walk 2 hours a day. He is now getting old like me and only walks an hour. And since gyms are closed, my husband now wants to walk the dog instead. He goes early, before I'm ready so I just sit here wondering what to do. Not a lot of motivation anymore.

I do a lot of little things for pleasure, crosswords, reading, my colouring, playing on the computer. Things like that.

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