Lessons Learned Later in Life
I was an HR Manager for 36 years at a major corporation and always felt like my job was to help the employee, not the company.
But for the last 10 years of my job, as part of my job, I had to lay off employees. Each time, I would find myself feeling anxiety, but knowing that it was "part of my job".
I was a company person, working 60+ hours per week, calling in on vacation, not taking all my vacation and giving my life to the company.
The term "psychological contract" always resonated with me - to me, it meant that we gave our all to the company and should be paid back with a good job and fair treatment.
In my heart, I know that was foolish, but somehow when you are in the midst of it, you fool yourself into thinking that for reasons of self worth, security, whatever....Anyway, your company violated your psychological contract with you - it's like being cheated on.
So....what do we do. As my therapist says, "you only have now". We have to lick our wounds, find ourselves and most of all forgive ourselves for giving too much of ourselves.
I am sure you missed family events, narrowed your group of friends and gave up life experiences so you could be successful in your job. I know I did that. but we can never get that time back.
But we can make sure that we don't let that experience rob us of today - that's all we have.
Find the things that bring you joy and use your spirituality and personal insights to learn from the experience. I do think of this part of life as a journey...some of us have to work at finding joy and forgiving the past. But it is work we have to do.
I wish you the very best and want you to know that I send you blessings and virtual hugs.
Given I can't figure out how to share my email on this site (sorry, Wendy - I need remedial training - LOL), feel free to connect with me on the retirement site. I'd be glad to email and share journeys.