by Carol, Canada

I did adjust to being off and sort of liked it. Take a lot of naps though and then I get nothing done. Didn't do much on my list of things to get done yet.

Booked a couple of trips, one to visit my daughter in Ontario, another one to visit my other daughter in the Cayman Islands and also a trip to visit one of my sisters in Arizona.

Sadly I've been sick for almost 4 months and I'm a person who rarely gets sick. Can't get rid of this bronchitis.

Then in February my son died of a fentanyl overdose after years of fighting his addictions. Well that kept me busy and still is, the paperwork never ends it seems. And now I feel even worse. To make matters worse, my husbands daughter also died of an overdose 4 years ago so we are both devastated. It's all too much.

So I have not had a good retirement so far. I have a house to look after and a dog which does keep me busy. And I did keep my car, after all, need it or I will feel confined at home.

I feel like a broken person though at a time when I only wanted peace and happiness at the end of my life. No child should die before the parent, too much to bear.

Comments for Lost

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Loss of Child
by: PLP Green Bay

My story is similiar in that I loss our 38 year old son in 1 year into retirement. That makes the whole retirment "thing" just that much harder in that you are in total grief plus this new life style that you thought would be just fabulous. Life gives you a real jolt.

Someone gave me advice (or told me) it doesn't take the magic one year as the second year is more brutal becuase you absolutely have to accept your child's death. The first year you are just lost.

It is now 4 years he has been gone. DO we still cry....yes, very much. Do we ache in our heart beyond belief, yes we do. But we have found life again. It comes back, NEVER the same, but it does come back.

It is such a difficult journey. When I watch on TV these parents of children shot, my hearts breaks for them becuase the grief, pain in your heart is forever. However, you do have to put the pain in it's place. I find Joe Biden inspirational on how he knows loss and can live on.

So sorry
by: Elisa

I am so sorry for your losses. They are tragic and sad. But you must continue living and trying to have your best life. Please don't give up. Honor the children by spending your remaining time on Earth in a positive way. Good luck to you and your husband. Hugs.

Lost & Found
by: Joe W.

Carol, you seem to be a very nice person helping others and thinking less about yourself. I suggest grieving for awhile then turn your automatic negative thoughts into positive ones. Your not at the end of your life yet. Your at a place where you still have real opportunities to be happy and turn this thing around and experience your best life ever.

Joe W.

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