Missing a Sense of Purpose

I’m a retired teacher who has been working in the field of education in some capacity since I retired. This was more for my sanity than a paycheck and helped to fill a void until I officially gave up paid work at age 70. I had a purpose and enjoyed the mental and social aspects of working.

My husband is also retired and the only thing he likes to do is watch tv and eat out occasionally. I would love to have a second home in a warm climate for the winter months, but I don’t see that happening.

I couldn’t up and leave for a warmer climate in order to have just one home since I have a daughter and a sister who are basically all alone here. I have another daughter and granddaughter about a days drive away. It would make seeing them a once in a year happening which I would hate.

Given these scenarios, I know that I wouldn’t enjoy myself even in a better climate. It would be nice to be outdoors and active enjoying many different activities, but my husband is not very outgoing, so it would mean that I would need to establish my own friendships. I’m not the type that needs to be on the go all of the time. I do play cards once a week now which I enjoy, I like to read and I do exercise some.

I am dreading the winter months!

Comments for Missing a Sense of Purpose

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Purposeless at Times
by: Canadian Retiree

Good for you for being able to work until 70 before retiring. I retired shortly after beating breast cancer at 63 (close to my 64th birthday). I had fully intended on retiring on my 65th birthday.

Like you, I floundered at first. It's kind of how I found Wendy's Retirement website. I was lost. I can relate to your frustration after having such a fulfilling purpose as a teacher.

I worked in a University Bookstore for about 20 years. My husband is not well so we don't do much as a retired couple. I have to find activities, like art classes, piano lessons, and other social activities on my own.

All I can say is that it takes time to adjust to the slow lane. I still have moments when I miss my job and coworkers. I have no children so no grandkids to take up my time. I almost envy my friends who do. I'm sure having family around helps with the loneliness one experiences in retirement.

Thanks for sharing your retirement experience and good luck!

Feeling ya'
by: Sandy

I struggled with retirement and the sense of purpose and still do occasionally.

My husband is similar to yours in his desires. He has few friends and stays mostly in the house. But, our life is worth doing what we bring us joy.

So, I told my husband that I needed more social interaction and that he could expect me to be gone for 2 to 3 hours each day either exercising or being with other women. He was fine with it and knows that it is to keep me mentally healthy.

Perhaps that discussion with your husband would be helpful. You only have one life!

Also, could you get him to go somewhere warm for just a few weeks in the winter as opposed to a long period of time?

Just a thought. Best wishes.

Happy to be Retired
by: Sherry/NC

I was okay with my retirement since 2016 until the pandemic hit and had to stay home.

I had a friend who was still working and she recruited me for a job in her office. I took it and work part-time and with my home duties, doctor appts., running errands I am busy again and have a purpose. The "purpose" thing is what will keep you going.

Wear your mask at all times. I believe it works and if everyone would wear a mask and with the upcoming vaccine would help to eradicate
the virus!

Take good care everyone and stay safe.

Avoiding Mindless Monotomy
by: Bernard Kelly - Geelong

I've taken to lifelong learning - and actually I'm teaching a class at my local community centre - "Maintaining Your Zest for Living"

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