On a merry-go-round and can't get off

by Judy/Louisville, KY

I retired 5 years ago (64 years old) due to a health concern and am having the most difficult time dealing with this transition.

I worked for G.E. for 25 years in management and then started a new career with a company in it's infancy, as Director of Business Development....so, to say the least, my career did define a large portion of "me".

I started to work part-time at a local hospital, registering patients, but my old company asked me to return and I started to work full time again this year, in a far less stressful position.

I live close to my children, so I have spent much of my time with my grandkids, enjoying their soccer games,school activities, etc and watching them mature....but now they are grown and I must say that I am lost.

I can't figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I want to move....I want to stay....I want to work....I don't want to work.....this is the first time in my life that I can't make a decision. I have always been adventurous, but I seem so stuck lately. I have gone through a lot in my life, but this "retirement" has been my most difficult transition.

I feel like I'm spinning and can't stop...now that I am working, I don't want to work.....am I just crazy?

Comments for On a merry-go-round and can't get off

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Retirement University
by: Pete/Flanders NJ

I retired in July 2015, after a 45 year career and at age 68. While planning my retirement I created the term "Retirement University".

The university has a wide open curriculum, no exams, no papers, no scheduled classes, grades, QPA's etc, just the mindset that now is the time to learn just about anything.

I have become a student of many subjects and a master of none. There are plenty of things to do and the good news, if you don't like a particular activity, you're under no obligation to continue. Today if I had to go back to work, I would be hard pressed to find the time.

The company I retired from did suggest part time, but then my commute was 30 miles one way and with traffic and weather conditions, why do it for just a part time activity.

Join a club, spend time at the library, volunteer at church or place or worship, community bands or choral societies. Google volunteer activities and you will get a lot of suggestions.

Judy on the Merry Go Round of Retirement
by: Ken San Diego

Hello Judy,

I hope you are doing well? I too HAD* the Merry Go Round effect after retiring Aug 11, 2016 1:00PM (heheheh I know the actual date and time) then it was FREEDOM! I was 66!

I have been working in the medical field for about 30 years.. and I have some health issues, which the doctors say they can help* with some surgery? I DON'T THINK SO! I know my body etc. I don't need a 'know it all' doctor suggesting what to do.

Plan some trips, and 'take your time when you get there' You don't need schedules, and making some spontaneous choices is fun! I hop on trains and planes and head out..I don't answer to anyone!

If I want to stay at home, on the computer, or watching tv, or watching my robot-vacuum cleaner vacuuming I do! I cook dinner sometimes, and other times, I go out for lunch / dinner etc. I might sign up to learn another language...since I know a bit SPanish (works well in Southern California) but I like to learn Thai (I have been in Thailand 13 times)... so tell that Merry Go Round to slow down because You are getting off!

SEARCH YOUTUBE for the song by Jane Olivor: ONE MORE RIDE ON THE MERRY GO ROUND" and let that be your theme song. Much happiness!

Stay focused, don't get distracted.
by: Anonymous

On the merry - go - round and can't get off, I would like you to stop pretending and get serious. Enjoy your life.Stop procrastinating use your talents and gifts to the best of your ability.Often retirees misunderstand their purpose with regard to moving forward.I believe God , bestows a gift upon us all.In turn each individual should perform task that allow retirees to keep on pressing and planning. Keep it moving !

leisure is a new thing, so I am grateful
by: Anonymous

I am just wondering if you see any value to leisure pursuits. I never had leisure while working, and treasure every second of it now, and have the sense that there is a big wide world I want to be thankful for.

So my walks for leisurely coffee and back, my leisurely preparation of my breakfast, lunch, and dinner, my leisurely gardening/mowing of grass, my leisurely study of another language, even this leisurely typing of this blog, leisurely having music on while reading a non=purposeful books, etc. are greatly valued by me.

I had one house guest (actually a refugee who just entered the us) for two weeks, and I enjoyed the leisure of getting to know her and the refugee system, and forming my thoughts about it all from my "living history" experience. Once in a while I get a foster puppy for a week max.

Leisure is brand new to me, and I hope this is helpful.

by: Loyce Smallwood

We are the results of our choices/commitments. When we commit to causes or individuals, sometimes when the children move on or the spouse passes, we "are lost" because parts of us have separated from us so we must strive to find new causes/commitments and relationships. This is challenging but doable.

Make yourself available and open so people are attracted. Read about others in similar challenges because we are all transitioning from health, financial and relationship problems. Join groups or start your own. Put a bookbox in front of your home; visit your local library; attend concerts; play music. Bowl, golf, volunteer.

Mix in; reach out. Exercise.

Give yourself time
by: Anonymous

You're not crazy. I also had a very hard time with transitioning in retirement. I got a part time job and now really don't want to work even though I enjoy the job.

I retired in 2014 and for a year and a half was very unhappy cause I felt so bored. I saw the part time job on email and got it, but about 2 weeks before I was supposed to start work I began to like getting up when I want and not having to go to work. Guess I was getting used to it.

It takes some a long time to transition after working 40+ or so years.

Give yourself more time and don't make a hasty decision about working. Good luck.

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