Problems With Adult Children
Until recently, I have had a good relationship with my 33 year old daughter but now our relationship is rocky.
I found a book in my local library titled, "When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us" by Jane Adams, Ph.D. This book is very useful to the baby boomer generation who have 20 and 30 year old adult children.
Our first inclination, as parents, is to blame ourselves for our children's problems. This author helps parents who are feeling guilt, shame or confusion about their children's wrong paths in their lives. Ms. Adams does not take sides as to who is to blame but instead gives psychological insight to why children and parents react the way they do to lifestyle, financial. and emotional problems that occur in a family.
I now have a much better understanding and feeling about my current, strained relationship with my daughter. I have stopped beating myself up and I have hope that the bad feelings between my daughter and I will be resolved with patience and forgiveness in our roles as mother and daughter.
Parents need to give themselves a break and accept the idea that adult children are individuals who will make their own decisions and they must be allowed to learn from their own mistakes.