Really scared

by anonymous

My wife has always been my rock. She managed the family and the money.

Recently she had ITAs, Parkinsons, cognitive and walking issues from a clogged carotid artery and now possibly seizures.

I am 5 years younger and still need to work at least two years until I'm 60. I'm terrified of managing the money and her care. I panic everytime I sense something is wrong.

I've been able to work from home, but it's long hours and eventually I will have to do some work back at the work place.

My depression is becoming worse. Though I take an SSRI, the help is marginal.

I'm afraid of retirement; I grew up with my parents worried about money and have the same feelings. I worry sick about paying medical bills and what will happen to my wife if I get sick because she can't care for herself alone.

I worry too about long term care. I certainly can't afford the insurance, and my wife can't get it given her medical condition. I wake up nights shaking. I could really use some help but don't know what to do.

Comments for Really scared

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my 2 cents to really scared
by: Carol from West Chester

Easier said then done sometimes but make sure you also pay the taxes on your house, if you own a home. Have someone help you set up a budget and a calendar with pay dates marked.

I have set up my gas/electric, tv/phone/computer service, water and sewer bills to automatically come out of my bank account. I do check the bills to make sure what is being paid. Medicare and supplement insurance also are automatically deducted each month. Now I do not have to stress about paying those bills, I do not have to have stamps handy nor do I have to worry about the US postal system not delivering/losing my payments.

I am sorry for your wife and her illnesses. You seem to be a very loving and caring husband. She is lucky.

Talk about scared!
by: Mountains

I was 28 years old living a thousand miles from friends and family; three small girls and a stay at home mom when my carousing husband left for greener pastures.

No money, had to have the fuel oil pumped out of the tank because I couldn’t pay. Selling my possessions to get enough money to go back home with my tail between my legs. Just went through cancer surgery not sure if my kids would have a mom.

But lots of prayer, hope and hard work, moved home, went to work, worked two and three jobs and bought a house, raised my girls, went back to school, moved up through the ranks at my job.

Scared every day, prayed snd prayed. Took no government help and my daughters have masters degrees, great jobs, no worries like I had and my granddaughter just received her PHD.

We were scared but we did it. You can do it.

Pray, make a plan. Call the local seniors center for advice and possible help and go to church. You will be surprised how much help your church will give.

You can and will do it!

scared scared
by: Anonymous


1) You CAN take care of the money issues. First, don't do anything big with the money. You need time to get going on this. Your main money priority is to keep the health insurances paid.

Always check with medicare to make sure the service your wife or you want is covered. The back of the medical cards have the number for you to call. Also, if you have a supplemental insurance for your wife, after calling medicare call that supplemental insurance, and see if they pay for the portion of her treatment that medicare does not pay.

I BELIEVE, but would need to check with medicare, to see if only a certain number of physical therapy sessions is offered per day.

Try home sharing with someone else in the home who in return watches your wife for part of the time.

Get some spiritual help online or in books.

Tell your wife you love her and hold her hand.

reply to wendy

My Thoughts
by: Wendy, Retirement Enthusiast/Coach

If you'd like to chat, please contact me. Maybe I can help in some small way to stop your worrying... give you some ideas instead?

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