Updated 2026. My mother passed at age 97 (2024) RIP. I will be updating this site so I can help retirees again. Write to me!

Re-invent, Not Retire!

by Monica Iler
(San Diego, CA)

Hi- I am a 66 yr old retired teacher. At the moment I am a bit lost - feeling isolated and very anxious and depressed.

i have always been the life of the party! My husband is an attorney and plans to work till he is 70. I have a 91 yr old Mom that is my rock! My daughter is 39 and married to her work so no grandkids in sight... I feel a great loss here.

I am not a very hobbied person, but I love people! I tutor kids some and I am looking for a part time job.

I play bridge, bunco, swim aerobics and go to a gym. I cannot seem to find my purpose!

Any one out there in San Diego that would like to meet up??? Love to travel and would be willing to take short trips!!!

Would love to hear from you-to get this old broad living again!!!!!


Comments for Re-invent, Not Retire!

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Did I just write that?
by: Helen UK

I soooooooo empathise with your post . I could have written it myself .

I am from the UK - an hour east of Manchester if your geography is good ! Today I am in Dubrovnik with the OH getting some sun and watching some swifts swirling above me on the balcony .

So why am I bored . I have no idea .
We've passed through San D a couple of times on visits to the States . So far we've dipped our toes in all of them bar Hawaii .

Are you interested in swapping notes . I have to warn you I was also called the life and soul of the party but I hate parties . In recent years I have done Myers Briggs and am INFP . Now if that doesn't put you off please drop me a line . 😉
Your Purpose Realized
by: Mark in Maryland

Hi Monica. I strongly suspect you have been so close to your purpose for so long you simply didn't recognize what it was: TEACHING, the most noble profession of all!

So here is my suggestion to you: accept that unlike 99% of the people out there you have not only discovered but fulfilled your true purpose.

When I did that about 18 months ago it was the most affirming, empowering and freeing day of my adult life. Every extra day I am allowed now is just icing on my cake of life.

You know you have discovered you true purpose if it makes you cry when you think about it. But they are joyful tears because you are filling a place in your heart that no other activity will fill.

It is also time to become what I call one of the New Explorers. You have been blessed with the time to explore all the things that you put on hold when you settled in to your teaching career, as well as limitless new horizons.

So go and have yourself an extraordinary retirement!
San Diego
by: Barbara

Dear Monica,

You live in one of the most beautiful cities in the country. Would you like to be penpals? I live in Orange County.

You are very fortunate to still have your parents.

Retirement will be a new beginning for you...don't worry - things will be just fine.

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