Retirement Changes Things
My husband retired at 62. We have been married for 46 years. Retirement rearranges the dynamic between couples. Both have to find a new identity and we see sides of one another that we may never have noticed. It is very difficult.
My husband is pleasant and happy. He is, however, one of those "take charge" people who was in management his whole working life. So now that he has no one to manage, he thinks he can manage my life. Things I've done for decades are now subject to improvement.
He has always been "nosey" but is extra-nosey now and has to know everything I'm doing, every thought I'm thinking. He even weighs in on how the neighbors live their lives!
His day revolves around his needs. Sometimes I feel like a babysitter. He does not like being alone. I am very much a loner. I liked it when he went off to work and I could be alone and free for a few hours.
But now, our world is all about him, his needs, his questions, his boredom, etc. Frankly, I find I don't really like him as a person. Sometimes I think I never really liked him at all.
I know there are all sorts of good advice here, but I still think the possibility of divorce should be an option for people who have simply had enough and want a life without having to carry another's burdens. Life is too short to hang on just for the sake of hanging on.