Retirement Song

 If you are looking for a funny Retirement Song for a Sing Along at a Retirement Party, this one works great!

Sing along to the tune of "My Favorite Things" from "The Sound of Music"! Think of the tune as you read the words below!

My Favorite Retirement Things...

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,

Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,

Bundles of magazines tied up in string,

These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs, cataracts, hearing aids, glasses,

Polident, Fixodent, false teeth in glasses,

Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,

These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak,

When the bones creak,

I simply remember my favorite things,

And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets, and corn pads for bunions,

No spicy meals or food cooked with onions,

Bathrobes and heating pads, hot meals they bring,

These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pains, confused brains and no fear of sinning,

Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinning,

More of the pleasures maturity brings-

When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, when the hips break,

When the eyes grow dim,

I simply remember the great life I've had,

And then I don't feel... So Bad!