What's it like to Be Retired? Interesting Commentary by Irwin!

They say she/he should have reached out

by Anna
(Houston)

Hello,

Last year my house was flooded; I became very depressed. I live alone, I am 77 years old with a mind and energy of a 50 year old.

I have a couple of friends, they still work so they do not have much free time. I have no family, I love to do watercolor, to write, and to cook.

I am so depressed I could just end it all... What is the use of having so much to offer if no one wants it?

I invite people for dinner, some come -- but they never call back (supposedly I am too good of a cook, cannot compete) some just do not want to have anything to do with me. I try, I try so hard.

What is it about me that turns people completely off?

I just wish I could close my eyes and never wake up. I was born in France, I lived in Mexico for four years, I am fluent in French, Spanish, and, of course, English.

One would think that I could communicate right?

Comments for They say she/he should have reached out

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I just wish it would be possible to connect with one another... am I the only one?
by: Anna Houston

I live in Houston, and I would love to meet some people who also live in Houston, or anywhere else for that matter... Am I the only one wishing this?

Wendy Join the private community (to the right) -- 2200+ retirees you can search and write to.

It can be lonely
by: Anonymous

Although I have a partner, he still works. My friends work and I have found it quite tricky to adjust. However, I think it is good to do different things in order to meet people.

I volunteer at an animal sanctuary and have met some lovely people. I am also a befriended with age UK and visit a lonely older woman once a week. We have become quite good friends.

You are obviously hugely talented. Share it around. Xx

Stay Positive
by: Len

Anna, please don't despair. There are lots of nice people out there in the USA I'm sure, as there are here across "The Pond" in the UK.

I would suggest you look in your local newspapers for clubs and group activities that you can join and meet like-minded seniors and I can guarantee you will make more friends than you can shake a stick at.

People in groups are more chatty and gregarious in groups, and you will gain in confidence and become the old you.

Warmest best wishes for the future.

Sign of the Times
by: John A. / Tyler, Tx

I don't think you have done anything wrong. My wife and I have noticed people doing the same thing where we live. I think it is a sign of the times where people are wrapped up in themselves, inconsiderate and have not learned social graces.

There isn't much you can do about that type of thing. You can only control the way you respond to these types of situations. You may need to look elsewhere for more understanding and considerate friends.

Anna
by: Anna

Anna, I understand completely what you are saying. Aging can be very lonely. I am trying to reach out to make new friends also. You sound like a wonderful person full of life and intelligence.

Unappreciated
by: Dean/ Nashville TN

Anna,

It sounds like you have so much to offer and are lonely. In 1993 I relocated my family to Tennessee.

We joined a local church of the same denomination (Lutheran) we belonged to up in New York. Very quickly we were accepted and had a whole new group of friends. If not for our church I'm sure our assimilation would have been much slower. There are always things going on at the church and anyone is welcome to be involved in those activities.

Just an idea but after reading your letter that's the first thing that came to mind.

Challenges of Life
by: Nina from London

Hello,

It must have been such a jolt to become so ill. But you seem to be able to face challenges and overcome them. What life offers at times surprises us. There are things that happened to me this past winter that left me losing my confidence. When you can't do the things that you usually love to do (because of poor health) it does change how you see yourself.

Like you I love languages. It is fascinating to be able to know how to speak and understand other cultures. Most of all I would say keep up the courage that you have.

Best Wishes, Nina

You have so much to give!
by: Anonymous/ Canada

Hi Anna,

Darling, Count your blessings! You are in good health and you are so active...and talented.

Since you are trilingual, you are way ahead of a lot of North Americans who are unilingual! You could volunteer or might even get paid at your local community center/ college to teach conversational French and Spanish to interested folks and English to newcomers (I'm sure you get plenty of those in Texas!)

Also, you are a good cook, so how about volunteering to cook for women and kids at your local shelter? I bet they will really appreciate your wonderful food and you could even teach them a few tricks in the kitchen!

If you friends don't appreciate you (they are probably jealous!), too bad for them!

Hey, make new friends! Get out of your comfort zone, do it! They will love you, mon amie!

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