Too old to move?

by Susan
(Colorado)

We’re in our early 70s and have been caring for my parents for the last seven years. Dad has Alzheimer’s and is 94. Mom is 91 and had a mild stroke. My sister decided she didn’t want to help and moved to a different state.

We are in snowy cold weather until my parents leave this earth and arrive in Heaven. Could be in our mid 70s by then or older. We’ve always been drawn to AZ because of the sun and yes, heat. We would have no family there, but dont see our sons all that much here.

We were snowbirds there for a couple years until my parents needed more help.

When are we too old to move? Should we leave the son and grandkids who live close by but hardly see? To their defense, they do work constantly with crazy hours.

If we were to move to AZ now, my parents would have no one in their final years. So we care for them and watch our retirement years pass us by (no offense to my parents at all...just our reality).

We are not rich, so must be wise about where we land. AZ would be more affordable for us.

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Comments for Too old to move?

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You must take them with you and MOVE.
by: Jane Curtis/Hawkins, Texas

If you do not follow your dream you will grow to resent your parents for living so long. That is itself is a tragedy.

When my grandmother got too old to live alone my parents took her with us where ever we went. There was always a center of some sort that did senior day care, etc. The point is if you are happy then all will be happy.

If you pick someplace with good weather, your kids will want to come see you to visit and not just to have a baby sitter. If you are not where you want to be you are taking steps to change it. One or the other. If your heart's desire is to move.. do it. Take them with you. You can make arrangements for them where ever you move to but you will be happy and have much less stress.

You want to miss them when they are gone ... not be glad to see them go...at last. That is no way to live for either of you. I know I am right.

Me too
by: Sandra

My husband are in the same situation. We are getting older and always saved for this great retirement but both our moms are still here but rely on us daily. Long story short we want to be snowbirds but we feel the need to help our moms more so cased closed at least for the near future!

Not too old to move
by: Leaking Ink

My husband’s cousin moved her Mother (who had Alzheimer’s) from New Jersey to Texas. It took some thought and logistics, but it worked out well for everyone. Don’t give up on your dream. Take your parents with you.

time
by: diane canada

I wonder if you could take your parents with you. More work but in the long run you would be where you wanted...

I do a lot of volunteering in a activity centre for seniors and over time have watched people i know well be there one day and gone the next. It is a constant revolving door, you never know what will happen tomorrow.

Bless you for being there for your parents. I find that once the kids have there own lives they don't have much time for us. I moved to be near my daughter and family but found i was a babysitter until they didn't need one and then rarely see them.

Build you life around your needs and your parents. my thoughts.