With 2 days to retirement, I am suddenly freaking out!!
I have finally made it to retirement!! I turned 62 this month and will get a decent retirement pension and social security. I will be comfortable financially.
Although I have little savings, I have all my bills paid off except my car. I have always lived paycheck to paycheck so that part (along with less financial responsibilities now) will be normal for me. Besides my car payment, I will only have rent, utilities & groceries.
Last night my friends had a surprise retirement party for me. Up until then, I was relaxing and feeling calm about all of it!
But today I am a LOT nervous and realize just how close I am to being retired. I want this part of my life to be the BEST PART. I suddenly feel sick to my stomach, anxious and worried about it now.
I have always wanted to retire to do my writing, artwork & photography, but I am beginning to wonder if and how I will get inspired. I feel exhausted!! I took a camp on a quiet winter lake until June so I would finally have some peace & quiet & healing from city life.
I lost my 91 year old Dad in July of 2012 who was so looking forward to my retirement, I have moved 3 times within the last year (noise issues) and I am still a bit shaken from ALL that.
It is not like my job was fulfilling! Plus the commute was awful!! My job has been slow for the last few years with downsizing inevitable so I decided to leave as soon as I qualified for social security.
So, I am READY to leave. I haven't read much on this website yet because it all seems too overwhelming to start when I am feeling this anxious...and because I never expected to feel this unsettled about retirement that I had to google this topic (although I think I may have come to this site a couple of years ago when retirement was in sight!)!
So, I wanted to write to see how others felt when they were this close. Did they freak out at the last minute? How did they finally settle in?
Shouldn't I be excited instead of a wreck... especially when I have been so calm and SURE about it up until this morning? I am having a hard time understanding my feelings!!
Wendy: COMPLETELY NORMAL.... even a voluntary retirement often finds anxiety during the retirement transition phase.
You have lost your dad, moved several times, now retirement -- that's a lot of "loss" and you may need to grieve those losses. Give yourself time.
You will be fine, it just takes time to adjust to the idea that you have no time committments, nothing to do (or nothing you must do), and to simply learn what you will do in your new retired lifestyle!
You'll be fine! Since you are a writer, do what you do -- write! Get out those feelings on paper, or here on the site, and each time you will feel just a bit better. Don't hold it in, scribble on paper and brainstorm it all out.
Wishing you the best retirement can offer!
Wendy's other site... because Aging Matters!